My Weekend (An Illegible Photo Essay)

This was the weekend I discovered, or rediscovered, several things.

1. I like apple beer. I like apple beer better straight out of the long neck in the car park of the bottle-o at a late hour, and a sub-zero temperature. I like apple beer best while watching dear friends dance with inflatable dinosaurs.


2. There are iPhone apps that will make your bad, drunken photos look like they were taken badly by your drunk parents back in the seventies. In one saturday night I managed to take about 83 photos of early, early morning fog and lamplights in Canberra. My apple-beer brain thought fog and lamplights were the most original photographic subject known to man.



3. Most importantly, all these factors conspired the next morning to convince me that the only thing that would alleviate apple-beer hangover was Gordon Ramsay style scrambled eggs.


Bad photo; good food. I like to think it encapsulates the paradox that is Gordon Ramsey: how can such an off-putting man create such tasty, tasty breakfasts? I don't know, but you have to trust me when I say these are the BEST SCRAMBLED EGGS I have ever had.





For those of you who don't want to look at Gordon Ramsey (I cannot blame you), these are the basics:

• Crack two or three eggs into a cold, non-stick saucepan.

• Add half to one tablespoon or so of butter.

• Put on a low heat, and stir (with a rubber spatula) continuously until eggs are well combined and butter is melted.

• Turn heat up slightly, and keep stirring until eggs thicken, and scramble. This might take a while, but it will be worth it.

• Season at the end of cooking, not the beginning! Salt does bad things to raw eggs.
  

Don't bother to add cream; you don't need it. Serve with toast and coffee and the slowly returning memories of last night.